We went down and walked out of the apartment. I was still thinking about Carlos, wether he might come back or something. Everything was a blur to me. I wanted to snap out of everything but it seems like I've walked into a trance. I started to daydream. In my mind I often daydream about things that aren't possible here in real life. Like, what if I broke up with Max and ended up being with Carlos. I stopped. It MIGHT be possible. Oh no, I'm starting to have feelings for Carlos. I didn't want to fantasize about Carlos at a time like this. I breathed and smiled at Max. "Honey, are you okay?", He asked. I made a face which that looks like a old lady being hit by a truck and burst out in tears. "What's wrong?", as he comforted me while rubbing my shoulders. We found a bench and sat there while I try to explain everything to him. "I love you Max", I said to him. "I love you too Anna, tell me what's the problem?", He questioned. "I just daydreamed about Carlos and Imagined myself not being with you. I don't want to be mean and I love you so much", I replied while bursting out in tears. "Hey hey hey.. Don't worry about that baby, it was just a daydream. I am not going to be a bad boyfriend and I promise to love you forever", He replied. He wiped my tears with his thumb and kissed my forehead. I was smiling. I was still stubborn about the whole thing. I wanted to crawl into a small space and die there. I didn't want to feel this way. I know now what it feels like to be guilty and mean. I asked him if I could go home and stay in my room with him holding me until I fall asleep and he agreed to and smiled. I was being vulnerable, a little too much I think. We got home real fast since I told the cab driver to drive extra fast and paid him fifty dollars to get me home quick. I ran for the elevator and clicked the button. As the doors shut, I breathed deeply and held on tight to Max's hand. I think I was hurting him. His face seemed fine though. I started to feel woozy and I wanted to lie on the floor. As the doors slide open I walked towards my door and turned to Max. "Can you stay with me tonight? Tomorrow Dani is coming back and we can go out for dinner tomorrow?" I asked and told him. His eyes were concentrating on mine. I wanted him to answer me and instead he held my hand, walked me towards my room and hopped in with me on my bed and shut the lights off. "Is that a yes?", I questioned.
I could hear him breathing next to me. He hugged me and went to sleep. I dreamed that night. It wasn't what I suspected, I dreamt of Carlos coming inside my room and hugging me from behind, like I was in a movie. Was I? Can this be real? I asked myself if this was a nightmare. But it wasn't. I was cheating on Max through my dream. I woke up wanting fresh air. The gasp I took wasn't normal like my other nightmares. I went into Dani's study room. A place where I can think and be normal. Suddenly, I saw something underneath Dani's diary, it was a photograph of Mom. But it looked like it was taken recently. She looks like the woman in the photo. I wanted to call Dani. So I called him using the home phone. Hello, This is Dani, sorry I can't pick up the phone right now, I'm kinda busy. So leave a message after the beep. *beeeep*. "Dad, I need to talk to you as soon as you come home. Oh and if you get this call me back. Bye" was all I said.
I looked at the picture again and compared to the image I had before she left. Brown hair, dark brown eyes, pink lips and tanned skin. She did have the same features but much more slim than before. "Maybe this is Mom" I whispered to myself. I wanted to deny it but I couldn't. I quickly put the picture back into the diary and walked to the kitchen. I made myself hot chocolate with crackers and sat down at the living room. I stared to daze at the window and looked at the starry night sky. It was amazing. I heard footsteps coming and I turned to see that it was Max. He was rubbing his eyes and asked me what was I doing sitting alone like this. I told him that I missed Dani and I was still worried about the whole Imagining with Carlos thing again. He made himself hot chocolate and sat down next to me. "Nothing is going to end between us Anna, I promise you, I would never leave you nor break your heart, that's if you promise to do the same thing", My heart was thudding like it was about to come out of my body and so I took a deep breath and said "I promise Max", and smiled. He kissed my cheek and watched the sun rose up with me. We talked all night about Dani and his family and how he was raised as a child. It was really interesting because his story was similar to mine. No one wanted to be his friend until the day when one guy asks if he could come over to his house. He knew it was actually a bet so that he could just steal his favorite stuffed animal that he sleeps with every night and show it off to the whole school. Everybody laughed at him. Until the day he went to collage, everything changed. I asked Max if I could take a walk alone later just to clear my head before Dani comes. He asked me if I was going to be okay and I replied to him by nodding my head. And he allowed me to just think for a while.
We eventually fell asleep and woke up around noon. Dani will be home at Dinner and I still have time to just take that walk at Central Park. I got all ready and Max was doing some research with his school work and he doesn't need me on it. I went down and walked out. Finally, fresh air. I can feel free. I sat down on a bench and just looked at people passing by. "Hi", a tender voice said to me. "Miss me?", he asked.
